Tuesday

Monday 19 June: Numb but cheered

07:21
300kmh hour crash on the M50 yesterday. Only kidding. Was at the Montreal Gand Prix.
09:00

1982 'God's banker' Roberto Calvi 62, head of Banco Ambrosiano, 62, found hanging beneath Blackfriar's Bridge, London in mysterious murder case
God's banker cashes in his chips, 1982
09:13
Infernal jabbering be gone. The ear plugs slowly expand in my passage pushing sound out like a sofa moves a cabinet to one wall.
10:08
TEXTER LIVING NEAR ARMY BASE: We're biting back and they're NOT blowing up obsolete bottles of cyanide in our village.
10:17
During WW2 a form of hydrogen cyanide Zyklon B was used in the Concentration Camps.
10:20
GRUPPENFÜHRER PAT: Zyklon B is not dangerous in certain concentrations. Perhaps the villagers would like to listen to my show and I'll dispel their fears? Time for ads.
Oh.
We don't seem to be able to line up our ads. How about this long and boring Neil Diamond song that sounds like Johnny Cash on helium?
11:42
It's ticking like a time bomb. He pisses in the street. Steam rises yellow as mustard. I try my old ahuck a huck a cough. It has no effect. Either he's deaf or he's oblivious. I stain my camera with a shot. He stands around urinating, kicking his dog. A horse passes by.
11:44
He walks and I hack in his general direction.
12:59
They don't last once they're shot:
[The victim] aged 32 and from Finglas, was shot twice in the head when he was ambushed by two masked men as he returned to his flat at around 9.30pm.
13:39
Cost of electricity up by 70% in three years.
13:44
MOAN: Blah de blah the Health Service didn't do jack shit about it.
HACK: And that's the end of today's news. (Jingle, mic is not switched down, the word "disgraceful" distinctly audible beneath the jingle sounds).
14:00
Prisoners attack prison guards in Cork. Six in hospital filling out compensation forms.
TXTRS: Call in the army and shoot them down!
14:05
CALLER: I just really wanted to bring up the point because there's people around the country worse off than me.
14:10
CALLER: I said, I don't need a carer's allowance because my mother passed away. They said, "Well your application is with the Deciding Officer. So you're getting it."
14:15
This laughter stuff is satanic in nature: "Of high importance is excellent communtication [sic] and a witty and charming sense of humor. (I love to laugh). If he is a great dancer and cook this will be a bonus!"
14:30
Dub girls spotted sunbathing topless on Donabate beach. That's bad enough when their boyfriends show up then wearing a white thong.
14:40
If you have ginger hair you're a minger, says the fantapant authoress calling from Britain. Who could argue?
14:45
People shout at you on the street. All redheads have the same problem. The silent majority have no idea it goes on.
14:50
Awaiting word of a big new contract. Sometimes the spec can be drawn up in a moment sometimes its drawn up in a long time.
15:42
My local chipper is ordering new linen napkins:
The Government has approved plans to create an extra 526 middle and higher-rank positions in the Garda.
16:16
Jesus the data from dublintraffic.com is taking ages to load. May be a data bus jackknifed causing a crash so the the serial Port Tunnel had to be closed in both directions during bitrush hour.
16:21

Traffic web update from the corpo at the biggest pinch point in town today.
17:45
Crush hour: It is understood the bus skidded to avoid a car which had broken the lights.
20:20
A young beautiful black (Afro-Hibernian) woman strolling casually by in very tight sporting clothes, gracing the female form without self-consciousness or inhibition in its best-proportioned glory. Milkshake. I'm strangely numb but cheered. Everyone appreciates quality.