Computer is on its knees. ON IT'S KNEES!
08:38
Email cleared. Appointments made. Apologies issued.
09:00
597 DIED: St. Columcille, AKA Columba, Irish monk, founder of Iona monastery, The Book of Durrow
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| The monks' monk, Columcille, died 597AD |
Friday in the sunny town and the sounds of trucks backing peeps through the air as a tram rattles past. The new national obsession is a haircut, a boy's head, where the real problem is that people are not accepting of differences. Differences are not encouraged by the well-groomed headmastrons of officialdom, the tight mustachioed arbiters of what's right on a head or not.
10:26
PAT THE RADIO PRAT: Our commercial break has failed yet again. It failed yesterday and the day before. Tsk. Can we try again?
(Beat.)
AD: Get breakdown cover for peace of mind.
10:28
TOLL GUY: Our toll agreement provides that we move with inflation each year. The rest of the increase is just in case.
10:30
TOLL GUY: There's no blip in your car when we take your money. You're not going to be told.
10:32
TOLL GUY: We're tagging you electronically like the cattle that you are. We call it "encouragement". We have account management charges to deal with. It's called a booking fee in other businesses.
10:35
PAT PENNY-PINCHER: I don't like it. Screwing the motorist.
TOLL GUY: You ring up and say "I'll be coming to Dublin" and pay your toll in advance. You pay three euro for this, where it's two euro normally. Because manual intervention required.
10:38
PAT POPULIST: Coercion.
TOLL GUY: “Encouragement”.
PAT PROBLEM: They never said the tolls were the problem before now.
TOLL GUY: The roads won't be built overnight.
PADDY PAT: What bout Gunther and Jean Baptiste?
TOLL GUY: We'll send someone to France to collect the 3 euro.
10:47
Fucking emotional human rights people on about the poor terrorists in the Gaza Strip. Bring on the Israeli. Poor fuckers with their Holocaust. Now they know prison camps, I tell ya, (from the fifties.) "Security." It's now their answer to every political question. Like "insurance" over here as the economic reason for the rising cost of shit.
10:49
JEW: I WANT TO ASK YOU - WHAT WOULD YOU DO? HOW WOULD YOU REACT? TERRORISTS!
HIPPIE: Collective punishment!
JEW: COLLECTIVE RESPONSIBILITY!
PAT PEACE: (The voices rise and people start shouting. Nobody is listening.) I have to take a break.
10:57
PAT WAR: Them Pallies are hell bent on destroying the Jews.
HIPPIE: You have to talk to them. It was a democratic election.
JEW: Join the dialogue when WE SAY THEY CAN! The international community of the US and us are calling the shots here. We have a right to exist. Slaughtering civilians? NO OTHER GOVERNMENT WOULD TOLERATE IT!
11:05
Pat is joshing with the sports guy and the sports guy is saying "Ah give us a break here." Sheesh. Tens-ION!
11:14
NIGEL RUGBY: I'm like a broken down record. Sorry for sounding like a broken down record. I'm like a broken down record.
11:22
GUEST: My mind was like a sandcastle being taken away on the surf. I knew then I was insane.
11:54
The air is light yellow afflicted by smog, cranes and the insane. This morning is quiet in the city as temperatures pick up to get over the noon day line. This afternoon will be good for drying the clothes on the balcony, window ledge, drying rack or whatever your city allows you to muster. Beware pickpockets. Beware the obnoxious. Do not be afraid and remember, all that summer style is good for the spirit so smile.
13:50
Dublin's mean motherfuckin' streets: More than €6,000 in aid money for Iraq has been stolen by thieves in Dublin.
16:55
Money and numbers game: He said he received a £600 donation from Monarch in 1991 which he passed to Fine Gael and he said there was a £1,000 given to Dun Laoghaire Fine Gael in 1995 but he said he had no recollection of a £500 donation in 1992.
