1815 Start of the Hundred Days as Napoleon returns to Paris from exile in Elba at the head of 100,000 men to fight climactic Battle of Waterloo
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| In there somewhere, The Corporal meets the original Waterloo, 1815 |
The only glacier on the Equator is atop Mount Cotopaxi in Ecuador.
10:24
I'm like an urban tracker. I've figured out that each dog has a signature sausage that they dump in the same place every time. So we may tailor make our messages about League affiliate political wing designated the "Concerned Resident's Against Poo" towards individual dog owners. This will save paper for other propaganda purposes.
FLYER DRAFT TEXT
Let's cut the C.R.A.P!
WOOF! NICE DOGGIE.
ISSUED BY: Concerned Residents Against Poo.
NOTE: Assertive but nice.
DRAFT 2
TOTAL CRAP!
We're watching you. Clean up your dogshit!
WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
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| C.R.A.P. badge |
NOTE: Assertive but menacing.
DRAFT 3
Turd of the Rings!
Your CRAP stains my shoes.
Let's cut the CRAP!
NOTE: Esoteric.
DRAFT 4
ENOUGH! C.R.A.P.
Clean it UP.
NOTE: Passive voice.
DRAFT 5
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF I PICKED UP AFTER YOUR DOG AND DID A HANDSTAND ON YOUR HALL CARPET? C.R.A.P. OUT!
NOTE: Visual.
DRAFT 6
This C.R.A.P. is killing me.
NOTE: Victimfuckingology.
13:51
The prisoners and the gaurds have an informal arrangement regarding phones, drugs and DVDs. Hear no evil see no evil. See him ringing the radio to threaten an angsty journalist? He'll be back on the wing in a week after being busted for calling Joeradio. Actually, I'm not sure if it was a threat, though, it was more of a recommendation I'd say.
13:55
HYPERBOLLOX HACK: I was in Hells Kitchen. It was a walk in the park compared to what happened in this country yesterday!
13:57
HACK: This is the first time anyone in this country get a glimpse of what these people are like.
13:59
(Garda-proxy moaning because if they whack any ol' knacker with their baton they have to answer questions about it.)
CALLER: Woe betide the man who uses a firearm. Unless the Taoiseach says it's ok.
14:00
HACK: McDog spends more time arresting journos than hatchet men.
14:02
EX COP NOW HACK: The malevolence exuded over the airwaves. The Irish people have been sheltered from that. Extraordinary radio. I'm ambivalent because I know what that means.
14:05
I've cogitated. We're emasculated. Ol' watchdog bodies. Gardai will be afraid to do anything. If I were a member of Joe Public I'd be afraid (but I'm not, I'm a hack. And I think I'm John B Keane for leathernecks.)
14:07
PRISON OFFICER (morose): We have to listen to their voices every day of the week. Threats. McDog hanging it on prison officers. We're fighting a daily battle to find mobiles in prisons. Mobiles come in small sizes and they're hidden ...
JOE: Inside their bodies.
PRISON OFFICER: And the punishment is not severe enough to stop them doing it again.
14:11
SOMEBODY: Bleedin' heart liberals!
14:13
A. N. Hack just said "Jesus Christ!" on the radio. Abusing his station as a tabloid journalist. Does he think that's appropriate even though he's indignant? He said "this bloody job" also. Aghast, I am!
JOE: Break.
15:31
HOODY HEAD: They cops weren 't shy about using their batons in Mayo. Or on May Day. So [fuck] that journo Pat Hyperbollox and his mates in Gardaland. They have a job to do and they blame anyone who [puts a hat down in front of them] for erecting barriers.
