Monday 5 February: You can't come to Clontarf and say that here

09:00

1914 BORN: William Burroghs, US author, The Naked Lunch (d.1997)
10:10
The most shoplifted book in the US, there have been an estimated 6 billion copies of The Bible printed.
11:50
Pat is getting all foostered and ninny. He must be sitting in the room with a beautiful woman.
11:56
Aaand, another string-twaddling singer song-writer makes a meal out of the word "shine" in their song. Pat is exasperated it's so religiously, cancer-survivingly joyful. Plus ...
11:58
Beth Nielsen Chapman. Good singing voice.
11:59
A loooong moment of silence to contemplate god then ...
12:00
The Angelus.
13:00
In his preview slot, Joeradio reports Ze Cherman Ambassador thinks the flatcappers with ze pixie heads are vulgar, overpaid and incompetent. The 'give Bertie a break' crew are ringing in now.
13:01
Complaints are of as A Deluge on the Internet, he reports, inaccurately.
13:46
Achtung! "Ireland is a coarse place with a sad history where the natives are obsessed by money. That, at least, is the view of the German Ambassador to Dublin in a recent diplomatic statement."
13:48
HERAUS!

He described the country's health service as chaotic with hospital waiting lists which would not be tolerated elsewhere.

GOTT IN HIMMEL!

And he revealed his amazement that Irish doctors who were offered annual salaries of EUR200,000 (STG £138,000) to work in the public sector turned their noses up at what they called Mickey Mouse money.

VE VILL SURROUND ZEM IN A PINS-ZCHER MOOF MENT:

But Mr Pauls ploughed on regardless, describing Irish history as 'even sadder than Poland' and relating an amusing anecdote, one that he clearly regarded as a telling observation on contemporary Ireland.
He said that he was at the National Concert Hall when an announcer appealed for the owner of a 1993-registered car to move the vehicle because it was blocking an entrance.

ZIS IS FUNNY, JA?

'Of course no one moved,' said Mr Pauls. 'All the Irish are driving 2006 and 2007 cars. For all I know the car is still there.' He also said that tourists from the United States had stopped visiting Ireland because they were sick of the incessant traffic jams.

AH YER ALL RIGHT RHEINHOLD, KEIN BOTHER ATALL:

Reinhold Herber, a spokesman for the German Embassy, said: 'Maybe he misjudged the humour. I don't think he tried to insult the Irish people. My Ambassador is a humorous man and maybe that humour was misunderstood.'

TIMESONLINE (link deprecated)
14:18
STRAM AND DRUMM: We don't feel comfortable with the truth. Get upset about it. He spoke the truth. We're top heavy in the civil service. We're coarse, the President of Ireland said that. Vulgarity. Celebrities.
JURGEN RADIO: And it took the German ambassador to come out of the trenches and say that?
14:22
I don't know joes. I've got nothing against diluvians.
14:44
Ze Irish people are Opel Corsas. 06 and 07s.
14:50
EIN CALLER: I live in Berlin. It's like Dublin in the rare ol' toimes. The kids drink one beer. No such thing as falling around. They welcomed me into the community centre. It's a very easy place to live. Very nice place to live.
14:58
In Germany everything works.
- Well everything works in Ireland too.
Well, look at the health service.
- Ah that's Utopian ideals. Look at the state of it in America.
21:22
Ze Cherman ambassador no apologee. Hup to him for his Italian-sized cahones. Said it was poxy translator who mished up the wordiage.
- Fine Gael have declared war on the German cunts, nevertheless, saying you can't come to Clontarf and say that here.