Christ the abhorables are at it again. Blak blak blak blak. I blame the women. They are ferocious talkers altogether. Girls.
09:00
1969 Student Jan Palach sets himself alight in Wenceslas Square, Prague, protesting Soviet invasion (self-immolation)10:10
A 1998 brush fire ignited 7 million tyres in California which burned for two-and-a-half years.
11:13
Sports dorks. To make Pat seem cool. And interested. "The golden era of golf. The best football. Dinner dances. Amateur. Pay for play. Professional. Abu Dabai. World Rankings."
14:08
CALLER 1: Charlie Bird (RTE's intrepid Chief News Correspondent) said it was no fun to go to the toilet in the Amazon. I don't know what he was expecting - the monkeys to come out and pick the nuts out of his shite? He said the river dolphin bit his willie. And Charlie, who is 56, said he still needs it.
JOERADIO: You might not be able to find it, but you still need it, even when you're 106. Who's Carlos?
CALLER 1: He was the guide.
JOE: Carlos Bird. More calls about Charlie up the Amazon and people think he was Up the Swanny.
ADIO: Buy more health benefits because you're fucked if you expect to find them available, the way we've stitched up the system to lock you out.
CALLER 1: I really don't think it was a documentary that was good enough for television.
JOERADIO: Half a million watched it. Charlie was box office.
CALLER 1: If you're popular you're popular. You should expect creepy crawlies in the jungle. People don't want to listen to moaning.
CALLER 2: There was monkeys and two toucans was all the wildlife I saw. You'd see more in Fota Wildlife Park.
CALLER 3: Such a wuss. He was scared of everything.
JOE: As in big girl's blouse (?)
CALLER 5: I think he was brilliant.
CALLER 6: I thought it was crazy - they should have sent you, Joe
JOERADIO: They wouldn't send me down the Liffey.
CALLER 6: He wasnt fit. He said he was old old old and he only 56. He had to share a hut, he thought it was terrible. Backside sticking out of a tent and he started screaming because there was a bluebottle in it. He should have brought a toilet with him.
JOE (colloquially): Half us raised in tena-mints in Dublin with no toi-leh. Or one between turty-fou-wir.
CALLER 6: The face on him. They had to get him out of the jungle because he didn't like flies or birds or wet shirts or anything. It was all about Charlie. He could have brought another shirt with him.
14:19
Stripey snow washed white fuckers whistling and carrying cans of bud on the streets outside.
CALLER 7: He was inspiring.
CALLER 8: I don't know, I'd make a better fist of it and I'm a lot older than he is.
CALLER 9 (woman, besotted): He was inspiring. Not childish. So child-like.
CALLER 10: Complete waste of licence payers' money. He could whinge for Ireland. Cribbing and moaning. Was he expecting a 7-star hotel in Dubai, boy?
CALLER: I felt he was going to pass out.
CALLER: I'd send him a medal.
CALLER 10: I like Charlie Bird but I was amazed, what do people expect in the rain forest or the jungle? The toilets are different in South America. He never spoke a word of Spanish. Never said 'gracias' or 'buenos dias'. Moaning in English. Shouting at them like they were deaf.
CALLER 12: Awe inspiring. Connecting because he showed them the Guinness logo.
CALLER 15: I thought he was absoutely magical. Showed all the feelings that a normal non-macho man would have.
CALLER 20: Show some enthusiasm. I went to the Amazon and didn't sleep because of the fantastic night sounds. I don't know why he was frightened, he had a guide with him. A local. I'd rely on them. He never stopped to look around to see how beautiful it was.
CALLER 25: Too much of Charlie, not enough of the place he was. I didn't see the point of watching Charlie changing his clothes and having a bath. He took the Holy Name in vain twice. I find that unacceptable. But otherwise good luck to him. Perhaps the excitement was hard if you're not feeling well out there.
JOE: If ye wanna see a piranha ye can go to Whackers Pet Shop in Parnell St.
CALLER 26: I want to see them in the wild.
JOE: Parnell st can be rough, now.
CALLER 27: I want to leave my husband for Charlie.
JOE: Valentine's day is 6 weeks away.
CALLER 28: Sure he was attacked in Dublin during the Love Ulster parade as well
JOE: Sure Dublin is more dangerous. He was bitten by the dolphin. Would you have your ointment for him then?
CALLER 27: I would.
22:46
"Mullingar in 1973 was the first time I ever saw cocaine. Sure it's self medication. We like our heroin, our coke and our pints."
22:59
VINCENZO: Is Miley O Reilly there?
PUBLICAN: Yes. And to add insult to injury, he's outside the door having a pull on his pipe.
CENZO: You there, Miley? Has random breath testing affected your ability to enjoy a night in the pub?
MILEY: Ah it has. Most nights I have to come down and have a bottle of coke.
CENZO: It's not the same, is it?
MILEY: It's not the same at all, at all.
