09:00
1938 Orson Welles' Halloween radio broadcast of War of the Worlds sets off panic in US as listeners believe a Martian invasion is underway there
10:10
Staircases in medieval castles ran clockwise so the knights could defend them more easily with their sword-bearing right hands.
12:28
It's all about the brutal bottom line nowadays. That's an agenda item, not a cause.
13:29
Bullet points. Give it to me in.
18:00
New report shows the Irish living for longer but drinking even more. It's all part of a balanced lifestyle. Nelson's body was preserved in brandy once he got fragged, and the sailors drank the brandy from the barrel when the corpse was finished with it. Waste not, want not.
18:03
There was a special clause inserted in a bill passed by Whiffo last week that allowed one of the Capos, a Patrick Plank, retired, to specifically benefit from hundreds of thousands in state pension claims. Nice work if you can retire from it.
18:05
57% more workers in the Health Service, budgets increased by hundreds of percent, Ireland is still only mid-way in OPEC for the good it's doing us. OEDC. OECD. ACDC. OMFG.
18:28
TOLDYASOTEXT: Oh we've bought and paid for secondhand school and hospital prefabs with our votes and these politicians are laughing the whole way to the bank, looking after Numero Uno.
18:34
THEM AND US: They had the chance to change. They blew it! How about some new prefabs with the pension money they're giving to former minister Patrick Plank. Tell the drivers all to stop using their footbrake, I'm blinded.
18:36
These creche owners should be prosecuted!
18:46
PROSCRIPTIONS: Quit bitching about prefabs. Email the politicians. Confront them on the street!
21:00
Let's see, the off-duty policeman who hit and ran over the head of a young lad whilst driving had on himself three pints. Oh and two bottles of beer at the party. But a meal. Yet he was found to be under the legal limit when breathalysed by a on-duty Garda. That means if I kill someone but I don't know the prat in a hat holding up the straw, I should tell them I'm a detective working under cover in the inner city. Y'knowwarimeen?
- Couldn't get a taxi and had a meal. The guy was lying in the road is just his own fault. Wheel spin.
21:36
New world's richest man and no, he's not from the Midlands, Kerry or Dublin. Some chappy from Bombay.
21:46
A DNA database. To fix the electoral rolls. Your dad and grand-dad voted Finda Fool. You're gene pool. This way please.
22:33
Crimeline. A production team of 50 addressing an audience of one. "I encourage that person to come forward."
